Sunshine Juliette

Sunshine turns 5

My baby girl turns 5 tomorrow. That means that 5 years ago tonight I was about 60 hours into the weirdest labor my midwife had seen in a while, and she was starting to freak out and mention going to the hospital. Nobody wants to see their midwife freak out, and so we packed up and went. Just a few hours before, we were walking around the block in the blazing sun, enjoying a little time alone in the fresh air, and I was irrationally frustrated because we had not yet picked a name for either a boy or a girl. There were several names floating around, but I remember saying, “Well, after all this hard work, I think I should get to pick Sunshine for a girl because I’ve always wanted a girl named that, and I think I deserve it!” Yep, the words of a laboring woman! Brandon’s face lit up, I remember, and he said, “We should name her after the July sun! It’s very appropriate! Sunshine Juliette!” And so she was named. What a sweet little baby. She is my baby I thought I couldn’t have after having my first baby I thought I couldn’t have! I would have ten more like her and it would not be too many. She was so ugly when she was born because her birth was so traumatic, and because she was so sick when she was born, but I didn’t really care. At 10lb 15oz, she was twice as big as Judah, who was my smallest baby at birth, at 5.5 lb. I thought she was my caboose. I knew life would be really hard for the next few years. She was my third baby in 2.5 years. I couldn’t fathom how ridiculous that was, and it’s a good thing I didn’t understand it until well after it became easy to take care of them about a year later. She was my only baby I took a semester off work for, and so she was my only baby I got to spend 24/7 with for her first 6 months. She was my second uncommonly beautiful baby, after Kiki. It only took her about a month to lose all that fat and her cone head, and then she took our breath away every time we looked at her. She looked like a little princess even way back then. She has been my only child who has distinct, consistent, well-thought-out preferences in all areas of life. She is just like my mom in that way. She does not like frills and prefers classy styles, unlike my glitter and ruffles Kiki. I am so insanely happy to have one of each! She gets along with everyone, but does not give in to what the crowd wants. Wherever she goes, she finds and surrounds herself with beautiful, kind people, and if there are not kind people around, she prefers to play by herself. Like her brother, she has her lovie, MaoMao, and she sucks the same two fingers I sucked when I was a baby. She was born on my Oma’s birthday. She still loves to snuggle and wants to be worn in her baby carrier. She is mischievous and spunky and rarely does one catch her without a smile on her face and joyful laughter on her lips. She is a smart girl, but has taken the longest to show interest in starting school. She is the kind of girl who will get frustrated when her brother or sister struggle with a math problem, and she will finally blurt out the answer for them, to my shock, and to their horror. She soaks up everything around her, and she keeps it all close to her heart. She will make a great keeper of secrets one day, a great friend. She was probably the happiest to accept her brother Kye Matthew into our family, as for the first time, she had a playmate who understood her and who didn’t treat her like a baby. She was also the one who took his death the hardest, and continues to take it the hardest. She has been through a lot in her 5 years, and has experienced it with poise and grace. She is such a lovely little girl!

And tomorrow she will be 5!

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